Chairs

The following was written by me sometime in 2001. The original was written with a teal glitter pen.

Chairs amuse me. They look like humans. What if humans sat like chairs do and chairs stood like humans do? Would the chairs sit on the humans? Why are lawn chairs stackable? They look like they are humping. Sometimes, people report cases in which chairs scoot across the floor by themselves. Perhaps chairs do have human-like brains. Perhaps chairs used to be humans. Lazy humans. And they were so lazy they evolved into inanimate objects. Or maybe, in millions of years, we will evolve into chairs. We are chairs' ancestors and they've traveled back in time to observe us.